Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Yesterday, during our first Parent and Family Orientation day, the first group of parents and families, Class of 2019 (Welcome, new Hofstra families!), heard me speak about letting go of the control we exert over our children, and how hard that is for us mothers, fathers, family members. They also heard about my yoga tribulations and my wonderful yoga instructor, Tomoko, and her exhortations to let go. In our last class, Tomoko read a beautiful poem about letting go, not necessarily only in regard to our children, that touched me. Here it is below. What are your thoughts and feelings when you read this poem? 

"She Let Go" 
by Jennifer Echert Bernau

Without a thought or a word, she let go.

She let go of fear.
She let go of judgments.

She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head.  
She let go of the committee of indecision within her.

She let go of all the 'right' reasons.
Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.

She didn't ask anyone for advice.  She didn't read a book on how to let go. She just let go.

She let go of all the memories that held her back.  She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward.

She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.

She didn't promise to let go.  She didn't journal about it.
She didn't write the projected date in her Day-Timer.

She made no public announcement.  She didn't check the weather report or read her daily horoscope.
She just let go.

She didn't analyze whether she should let go.
She didn't call her friends to discuss the matter.

She didn't utter one word.  She just let go.

No one was around when it happened.  There was no applause or congratulations.
No one thanked her or praised her.  No one noticed a thing.
Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.

There was no effort.  There was no struggle.

It wasn't good.  It wasn't bad.
It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be.

A small smile came over her face.
A light breeze blew through her.

And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.


  1. Right on time for me. Thank you.

    1. Thank you for sharing .... there are many many mothers and fathers who feel like you.

  2. Reminds me to approach everyday with a "blank slate" of mind & attitude

    1. Exactly! It is so much easier like this. My worrying will really not help my children.

  3. JoAnn Mercieca --- So appropriate as my youngest child leaves for college (my second to Hofstra) this September. Touched me on so many levels

    1. You are a veteran Hofstra mom! Please keep on writing here - I invite your own articles of advice to new parents.

  4. Luckily, my son inspires in me the greatest confidence, and from the time he went off to Hofstra last August, I never had a moment's worry about how or what he was doing. I would see all the photos of him around the house every day, and think of how I had let go of each one of those stages--the infant, the baby, the toddler, the school kid, the teenager--along the way. He's a young man now, and I'm proud to see him fly!

  5. I am so proud of your son! I love your ability to put the milestone moments in a grateful perspective.

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